Let Go of What You Cannot Control

Bertolucci’s second key to happiness is to let it go. This, she said, is the principle of acceptance. Truly, we want to be in control most of the time. We want things to go our way. We want our friends to follow our advice and decide based on what we think is better for them. 

This is also the same with our expectations from other people. We want them to treat us the way we want to be treated, and respond to us in certain ways. And when they don’t we end up upset, disappointed, and frustrated. We often forget that those decisions and actions are not ours to make in the first place. 

How many times have we felt devastated because things didn't turn out the way we imagined it in our heads. All of these negative emotions came from the fact that we have difficulty accepting that what has transpired is beyond us. 

At times, no matter how hard we try, no matter the planning and the preparations we make to disaster-proof everything, they just fall apart. Leaving us helpless, and the feeling of helplessness is something we are not keen on feeling. 

But if we learn to accept that there are things that are not within our power, we will be able to approach them differently. Acceptance will allow us to let go and eventually move on. By doing so, we realize that no matter how much we want things to turn out, they will not always go our way, and that is all right. 

We do not have to always get what we want. And often, not getting what we want is a great thing. It may not make sense at times, but eventually it will. It may not be an easy pill to swallow, but sometimes you just have to accept that, it is what it is, and that our energy is better spent on something else.